Rediscovering Our Inner Superhero: The First Step in Relational Healing

“Relational healing begins with remembering the superhero within—the childlike joy, wonder, and power that has always been ours.” - Mary Coughlin

Last weekend, my two sons went to comic-con, and my younger son brought his little boy with him. He was over the moon—dressed head to toe as Spider-Man, his favorite superhero.

The picture is so sweet.

But what struck me most wasn’t the costume—it was his authenticity. His absolute belief that he was Spider-Man in that moment. His joy. His wonder. His sense of possibility.

And it made me wonder: when did we, as adults, lose our vision of ourselves as superheroes?

Children come into this world radiant—curious, joyful, full of wonder. Their natural state is expansive and alive. But as they grow, they unconsciously absorb the world around them: the spoken and unspoken messages from the adults in their lives, the expectations, the judgments, the fears. Slowly, their innate joy and power get pushed underground. Buried beneath conformity, insecurity, and self-doubt.

And in that burial, something vital is lost. We become disconnected from ourselves and from our Source. We forget who we are.

This is why I believe the first step in relational healing is not with others, but with ourselves. We have to unbundle and unbury our true self. We have to peel back the layers of messaging and fear to rediscover the authentic core that has been there all along.

Only then can we show up to the world and to each other as our whole, true selves. And in that space of authenticity, relational healing becomes possible. We can remind one another of our worth, beauty, and power. We can call forth each other’s superhero selves.

Because the truth is, healing isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about remembering who we already are.

So maybe the invitation for us all is this:

• To notice where we’ve buried our joy.

• To unearth the parts of us that still long to play, to imagine, to dream.

• To step into our own superhero cape, not as fantasy, but as the most authentic version of ourselves.

Relational healing begins here—with me, with you, with the child within us who has always known the way.

Reflection Prompt

Where in your life is your superhero self waiting to be unburied?

With courage, care, and a little superhero spirit,
Mary

P.S. My grandson may have been Spider-Man for a day, but TIP is where you get to practice being your own kind of superhero for a lifetime. Want to join the league? 👉 Find out more here