Love as a Systemic Force: Healing Society Through the NICU #7
“The future of healthcare will not be built on efficiency. It will be built on relationship.” - Mary Coughlin
Love as a Systemic Force: Healing Society Through the NICU #7
Week 7 — Caritas and the Commons
If you’ve spent time in the NICU, you know something profound: healing is never a solo act.
It happens in the spaces between us — between clinicians and families, between team members, between leaders and the culture they steward.
These spaces are what Caring Science calls the Caritas field; a shared relational environment shaped by compassion, trust, intentionality, and love.
What we often forget is that this field is not just personal. It is structural. It is cultural. It is the commons; the invisible ecosystem that determines whether people feel safe enough to show up as their best selves.
A system without Caritas is a system without oxygen. People can function, but they cannot flourish.
A system infused with Caritas, however, becomes a place where:
Teams collaborate without fear.
Parents feel dignified, not diminished.
Babies receive care that nourishes their neurodevelopment and their humanity.
Leaders model presence instead of pressure.
Caritas creates the conditions for wholeness; not by demanding perfection, but by nurturing belonging.
This is also the heart of Trauma-Informed Developmental Care. TIDC is not simply a clinical framework; it is a social ethic. It reminds us that relational safety is what makes growth possible in infants, in families, in clinicians, and in systems.
When we widen this lens, we begin to see the NICU as a living microcosm of the world we long for: a world organized around care rather than coercion, connection rather than hierarchy, healing rather than harm.
Imagine if healthcare systems were built like a village not a factory. Imagine metrics that measured belonging as rigorously as budget. Imagine leadership that understood that love is the infrastructure, not the afterthought.
This is not utopian. It’s practical. It’s evidence-based. And it’s urgently needed.
Caritas and the commons invite us to remember that how we care for one another is the system.
Not the policies. Not the workflows. Not the outcomes dashboard.
The relationships are the system.
And when the relational fabric is strong, everything else becomes possible.
Reflection Prompt
Where in your workplace do you see the Caritas field flourishing?
Where does it feel thin or fractured?
What is one act of relational generosity you can offer to strengthen the commons this week?
Science | Soul | Skill
Science: Belonging, trust, and relational warmth activate neural pathways associated with resilience, decision-making, and emotional regulation — improving outcomes for teams and families.
Soul: We heal in community. Isolation is a wound; connection is a medicine.
Skill: This week, practice the “Caritas Check-In”: Before entering a space, ask: “What energy do I bring, and how might it shape the commons we’re creating?”
Until every system remembers how to love,
Mary
P.S.: Many readers have asked how to translate these reflections into daily practice. The Trauma-Informed Professional (TIP) Certificate Program is designed to do just that — weaving science, soul, and skill into tangible ways of caring for babies, families, and ourselves. If you’re feeling called, I’d love to welcome you.
